Friday, December 26, 2008


ya I'll be here too

Thursday, December 25, 2008



(11:25:20 PM):
and home will just be where your family is and friends

today was suppose to be the happiest day of the year
i almost let something stupid ruin that
well not really something "stupid"
just something that is going to make me a stronger person in the future

I could not ask for a better family.

seriously i don't think i could ever connect with anyone as much as i do with you
someone who i only see once a year

he is a best friend disguised as my cousin

merry christmas =]

Friday, December 19, 2008

Patrick hit it right on the head

when he said this generation is the most selfish and narcissistic of the bunch
[basically the theme of folie a deux]

you're so vain that you probably thought this was about you

Thursday, December 18, 2008

She's my Winona

"They always bring up how you've changed,
never the same person when I go to sleep
as when I wake up"

seriously this is brilliant
you are never the same person as you were
 as when you wake up

everyday you learn something new, about yourself or someone else

so next time someone complains how I've changed...
I'm gonna say "Thanks, I did get smarter, I know"


Amaze me.

"the gaps between our houses get smaller
while the holes inside them grow larger,
until they are the same as all the others.
sad boys grow up, try drugs and fall in love.
It's our insides that we're running out of"

Wednesday, December 17, 2008


"Life is just a pace-car on death"
too much blue never looked good on anyone
and a frown upside down shines brighter then you think
these are the good days whether you realize it or not
we have it so easy, and now is the time to appreciate it

Tuesday, December 16, 2008


And I'm a sunshine machine
I want to get stuck
I want to get stuck
And be glowing in your memory

Honey is for bees, silly bear

Honey is for bees, silly bear
besides there's jelly beans everywhere
its not what it seems in the land of dreams
Don't worry your head just go to sleep
it doesn't matter how you feel
life is just a Ferris wheel
It's always up and down
don't make a sound

when you wake up the world will come around
when you wake up the world will come around

its just the sweet weather and the peacock feathers
and in the morning it will all be better
its not what it seems in the land of dreams
don't worry your head just go to sleep

when you wake up the world will come around
when you wake up the world will come around

honey is for bees silly bear
besides there's jelly beans everywhere
its what it seems in the land of dreams
don't worry your head and got to sleep


I'm Speechless...

Sunday, December 14, 2008

American Beauty,

"If you're not yourself
then you are just ordinary,

and being ordinary is
worse than anything else"

Saturday, December 13, 2008

brings tears

They are killing me

all i wanna know are the words...
and all i get is a blank song booklet and a website that doesn't work...

Thursday, December 11, 2008

"Sometimes words are not enough. Other times, they are all I have"

Does he know the way,

of the crickets that would convince me to call it a night?

[Oh darling, I know what you’re going through]

haha so in prep for next friday...

i watched this =]

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

just remember

It's like they took the words right out of my mouth

"People put music in such a weird context,
like it's a life-or-death matter.
It's not.
It's music."
-Andrew Seward, Against me!

"There's a lot to be said for bands who fight to be relevant.
But convincing people you're relevant?
That's like telling people it's not raining when they're soaking wet."
-Pete Wentz, fall out boy

preach electric to a microphone stand

I can't explain a thing
I want everything
To change and stay the same on top
doesn't care about anyone or anything
now come together, come apart

I'm a mascot for what you've become
and I love the mayhem more than the love

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Stole this from cara =]

its amazing how when you read something that you can relate to,
something just clicks and you don't feel so alone any more...

"love the fact that no matter how crappy your day is and how much you have going on you can just lay down in bed, put some music on, and close your eyes and you immidiately feel better. it's like emotional tylenol.

as lame as this sounds, i wish that i could thank my favorie bands for getting me through the hardest times of my life. i don't know. i guess i just think it's amazing that i have something, that no matter how mad or sad or pissed i'm feeling, will make me feel better. i really hope that everyone has something like this. i guess for some people it's sports or movies or writing or drawing or painting. for me it's music. playing it, listening to it, attempting to write it. it makes everything better. at least for that moment.

for the few people that bother to read this i'm going to leave you with a quote that has always stuck in my head but i just remembered today. it's not even so much of a quote as it is a whole livejournal entry, but read it. i promise you you won't regret it. if you're like me you might even relate to some of it. i guess it's not even totally on the topic of what i've been talking about, but some of it is. and in general it's just something that i think you all should read. i'm going to stop rambling and copy and paste this thing. enjoy."

we were attracted to the life for a reason.

we sing the songs of rebellion and raise our fists against it all.
we chant slogans and read books and find music in opposition. in protest of a life we dont want.
a refusal of common and boring.
our dissent boils over with middle fingers and blue hair. because fuck them, right?
dont get it. they dont see what we see. they dont live the lives we do.
no one understands but those singers and those with the heart to hold
the protest signs.

and thats fine.
better than fine...

but why?
for what?

be different. be weird. be unique. be gay. be free. be fucked.
your hair. rip your clothes. tattoos your skin. read books your parents
told you not to. watch documentaries. listen to artists. love who you
want. stand for a cause. raise your voice. oppose the haters. speak up.

but remember why you do it.

if you have green hair and you dont know why, fuck you.
if you sing along to the rally song for the hook, fuck you.
if you pick up a cause and dont know why, fuck you.
if you tour the country in a broken van and dont see the beauty in 3am gas station dinners, dont do it.

i dont know your inspiration, i only know mine.
this scene. this culture. this a parachute, not a destination.
its a scope for your high-powered rifle of splendor and wonderment.

is supposed to be a purpose behind all of this. not all that DIY/punk
ethos im always talking your ear off about...but about building a
better life for yourself.

we are attracted to this for a reason.
in the beginning it all seems so clear but after time, tends to lose
its luster. the image gets smudged by back-stabbing, scene points, who
got to the barricade first, list spots, message board drama, backstage
passes and name dropping.

dont you remember why you wanted this?
when it was more than music. when it was a fight. and not a fight
against your parents and the kids at school or even the popular radio
dance crap you hear day in and day out, when it was about a real
fight...the fight to save yourself from yourself.

see, this isnt
about that hot and sweaty feeling of being smashed in a sea of a
thousand people or dressing up for the show on friday or throwing
elbows at the dude who is sweating all up on your back or winking at
the bass player or impressing boys or girls or bands or security guards
or getting on tour busses...

its about being alone in your room with headphones on and feeling it so hard it brings tears to your eyes.
about driving home alone at night and screaming at the top of your
lungs to words that at that moment in the world, only you understand.

its about not being scared anymore.
its about the refusal to sit on a couch and rot.
its about forcing yourself out the door to be productive.
and its about wanting to live so hard you just know you're going to shred this world or go out trying.

while you're off playing 'punk' or whatever it is your crazy kids do these day, remember one thing...
is not here by accident. groups of people across this world make this
possible because a few groups of people before them had a crazy idea
that life is ours for the taking and we get to paint it any fucking
color we like because its the only one we got and we need to make the
best of it.

to make it fun.
so that one day, we can learn to have fun and smile when it snows and get excited to pass on the secret we learned about life.

thats its not about playing things safe, because safe fun is for retards in bike helmets and knee pads.
real fun is in the adventure of the leap from the stage to the crowd.

and real living is in the faith of knowing someone will catch you.

because you would for them

-christopher gutierrez


Monday, December 8, 2008

"I expected more from you"

For all the darts that are thrown at me,
Why would you even try to get me?

I've been this way my whole life
stop dissecting me
(they never stop dissecting)

Outside looking in has never done anyone any good.

My head has always been blurry, but so has the future
So I'll sleep on it and pray for better days.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

"If home is where the heart is, then we are all just fucked"


I continue to tell myself that I'm ok,

That is like trying to convince myself that I can walk through water without getting wet
Sitting here I've already began to shiver
Right or wrong, I'm becoming numb to it all
Everyone deserves a flame

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Hell or glory, I don't want anything inbetween...


Friday, December 5, 2008

holy shit...

Saturday in Seattle from clandestine on Vimeo.

this gave me chills right here

if you watch any of this video...the last min is the best =]


"We breath life,
like this towns
never seen before"

I owe some of the most amazing, unforgetable nights to these guys...

thanks a million<333

ohh totally making a prediction
water buffalo
tiffany blews
and (coffees for closers)

they are gonna be my fav tracks of the new album =]

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

"If its not love then

it's the bomb that will bring us together."

the words i have to say are too deep to be written.
they are soo heavy that they could bleed right through this page.
The ink in this pen can only spill so much of me at a time.
It scares me to know that I have this much feeling.
This may be the trigger to the countdown.
I'm like a bomb ticking,
to be set off.
I'm ready,
ready to explode into one hundred different directions.

i need ideas for a tat

hmm maybz a skyline in the middle instead
this is just the begining

hmm idk i kinda like piano keys too...

Monday, December 1, 2008

And Don't Forget,

without you, there is only me

Don't get me wrong
I won't let this go...

Just think of me as
the bomb that is going to
set you free,
from love,
from heartache,
from disappointment,
from life
forever <3